Is this hypocrisy?

Throughout the short history of this blog one of the recurring themes has been ecumenism, or the open acceptance of those members of the Christian community with differing doctrinal beliefs. This blog began with a question; “Are Mormons better Christians?” which started an ensuing dialogue among people of varying faiths that continues to this day. I like to think that the conversation we have been having has been productive and glorifying to God by way of accepting the individual without feeling threatened by his or her belief set.

However, I have recently become part of another dialogue attached to someone else’s blog, which incorporates not only Christians of various doctrinal positions, but atheists, and spiritualists from all walks of life. As a result I have found myself repulsed by this group’s blatant misrepresentation of the Bible and the preposterous notion that although we believe differently, we still can find common ground for our faith – or for some a lack of it. In case you can not see me, I am shaking my head. In case you can not read my thoughts or between the lines on this page I am thinking about “bull excrement”, if you get my drift. There can not be, in my humble opinion, common ground between Christians and unbelievers.

Is this hypocritical? Should I be more tolerant of atheists who call my God a liar and tell me that His book, the Holy Bible, is nothing more than a book of fairy tales and philosophical hogwash? Is this not the same way staunch Fundamentalists feel about the Book of Mormon? Then how can I be accepting of the one and not the other? What is it about our humanity that draws proverbial lines in the sand and dares some people to cross it, but not others? Do we perceive one group to be a greater threat to our faith over another? What does this do to our witness? Will we witness to one group because we want them to experience eternal life but secretly wish the other more threatening group to simply rot in hell?

Personally, I feel as if the only spiritually responsible thing I can do is to stand in defense of my God, my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I can fellowship with those who claim to believe, whether I perceive in them to be doctrinal error. However, I find it impossible to reach out in love to someone who calls me a fool for my faith and in so doing blasphemes my God.

Living Transparent

I did not choose to be a writer. In 2003 the Lord God and I made an agreement: I would walk through any door He opened. When a veteran writer offered out of the blue to pay my way to my first writers conference this past February, I did not hesitate to accept the opportunity to begin a writing career.

Through that experience I have come to realize that God opens doors in many ways. One way He does so is through His children, like the man who paid for my conference. But before this man made the decision to risk his money and his reputation on an unknown writer, he first had to see himself through the eyes of God as that door.

To be used of God to further His kingdom begins with recognizing that our lives and everything in it are not our own. All that we have, money, time, talents, personal possessions, belong to Him. We are merely stewards, managers of His benevolence. It is out of this relationship that we then craft our identities and discover our purpose for existing. When our identities are rooted in the purposes of God we no longer wake up and see ourselves as mother, father, sister, brother, student, wife, husband, etc., but as children of a divine God who is on a divine mission.

The measure with which we trust and embrace our identities in God determines the measure God uses us to carry out His plans. However, to fully understand this principle, one must come to terms with certain paradoxes contained in the Bible. Over and over Jesus taught that the first will be last and the last will be first (Matthew 19:30), and that anyone who desires to be first will be the servant of all (Mark 9:35). From these examples we can see why Jesus told his disciples, “everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted” (Luke 14:11 NIV).

The scripture is clear; the one who wants to be used of God as a door of opportunity to advance the purposes of His kingdom must first take the form of a humble servant. Philippians 2:3-11 tells us that to achieve this Jesus himself took the form of a servant by emptying Himself of all His rights and privileges. Nothing leaves a man feeling more vulnerable than to put aside his personal rights and privileges thereby removing all forms of self reliance and self sufficiency. To do so leaves us open to attack and makes us completely dependent on God.

And therein lay the keys to being used of God: vulnerable to the world, and dependent on God. In my 40 years of living around Christians, I have noticed that the men and women God uses the most to change people’s lives are not the movers and shakers of their respective denominations. The most effective Christians are not even the charming, charismatic mega-church pastors. I have discovered that the most effective Christians in the kingdom of God are common everyday men and women, boys and girls of all ages and all colors who simply open themselves up to the world and say, “Let me share with you what Jesus has done in my life.”

Effective Christians do not hide behind false bravado or shy away from the truth. Effective Christians are everyday people who expose themselves to the world and live transparent lives because they have a passion to see the lives of other people changed by the Lord Jesus, just as their own lives were once changed.

An effective Christian is the alcoholic who once beat his wife and kids, but then gave his life to Christ and now shares his story of redemption with other alcoholics. An effective Christian is the teenage girl who used to cut herself, but then found love and security in Jesus and the Church and now brings other cutters with her to her youth group. An effective Christian is the woman who was raped by her father as a child and now shares her story with other rape victims. An Effective Christian knows the living God as the God of all comfort and sees himself as the doorway through which others find healing and comfort. For this reason effective Christians live transparent and vulnerable lives.

25 Things About Me

I can not help but notice that on several of the blog I read the authors have made a randomized list of facts about themselves. I swore I would not do this to my blog. However, today I while reading the blog of a fellow writer I came across one such list and noticed a feeling a comfort wash over me as I discovered how much we have in common. So, today with the hope that you just might find some level of comfort knowing someone out there in this world is just as messed up as you are, I offer to you in no particular order my list of 25 things you may or may not know about me.

1. I am 160 pounds overweight.
2. Although I became a Christian the day before my seventh birthday, I spent two years dabbling in the occult as a teenager.
3. I am a recovering sex addict.
4. I hate exercise (which is a leading reason why I am so overweight).
5. My favorite meal of the day is breakfast.
6. My favorite breakfast is lox, onion bagel and cream cheese with red onion, tomato, and olives.
7. I was born in Oklahoma, raised in Texas and North Carolina, and have never eaten at a New York Deli.
8. I am passionate about: Cooking, Writing and the Bible.
9. Deep down inside, I fear success almost as much as I fear failure.
10. I live with some level of ADHD and can not concentrate on any one task for more than a few minutes.
11. I have designed or invented five things that are being sold today and making millions of dollars for their respective companies, none of which I patented or ever brought to fruition.
12. I dropped out of high school three times.
13. It took me eighteen years to get my four-year degree (BA in Religion).
14. I am a retired truckdriver. I drove 18 wheelers for four years and then dump trucks for another four years.
15. I used to stutter so badly I couldn’t say my name. Today, although I still occasionally stutter, I am able to speak in public without difficulty.
16. I have moved 42 times in my forty year life (no I was not an Army brat).
17. I have driven the entire length of Interstate 40 from Barstow, California to Wilmington, North Carolina (2554 Miles) three times.
18. If I was not working toward a writing career I would be in school right now studying to be a chef.
19. I was borderline schizophrenic when I was seventeen years old.
20. I was suicidal from the time I was seven until I turned thirty.
21. My theology is so impartial toward man, and so rooted in scripture that neither the school from which I received my Associate of Divinity, nor the school from which I receive my BA in Religion will accept me into their Master of Divinity programs.
22. I have been released from addictions to alcohol, pornography, and cigarettes.
23. I love to sit and watch thunderstorms in the spring and summer.
24.I hate snow, which is probably one reason why I still live in the South.
25. I have a quick temper and sometimes struggle with anger issues.

Who are you?

Update: Blue Ridge 2009

It’s past time for an update on the 2009 Blue Ridge Mountains Christian Writer’s Conference. I apologize for being so slack, but slack is what happens when you return from a writer’s conference on a holiday weekend and the whole family takes off from their usual routines. To say the least, it has been very difficult to find the time to write.

In case you are wondering, the conference was a huge success. This year was Alton Gansky’s first year to serve as conference director, having been passed the torch from Yvonne Lehman who directed the conference for the past twenty-five years. Both Alton and Yvonne are highly successful, award-winning authors and know what is takes to put on a an incredible conference.

For me the BRMCWC was my second conference, the first being the 2009 Florida Christian Writers Conference. Having one conference under my belt made the second less overwhelming and more enjoyable; still, there was a lot to take in. From among the Who’s Who in writing names like Cec Murphey, Angela Hunt, Eva Marie Everson, Chip Macgregor, Ann Tatlock, and Steven James filled the program.

I have to say that the highlight of the conference for me was the few brief minutes I sat under the teaching of Chip Macgregor, author of the best blog on writing you will find on the Internet, and president of the second largest literary agency in the United States, both which bear his name. While I did not attend any of Chip’s classes (his classes were too advanced for a person with my level of expertise) I did come semi-prepared to pitch to him an idea for a book. To my astonishment, he showed interest, and gave me some good didactic feedback that will help make my book more appealing. He instructed me to query and send to him a retooled outline of my book which I interpreted not so much as getting my foot in the door, but at least getting one toe stuck in there somewhere.

Throughout the conference several people asked me what I was getting out of it. I was never sure how to answer their question because it often takes me stepping back and seeing the big picture in order to see things in the component parts. Now, looking back I would have to say that besides a meeting with one of the leading literary agents in the country the most valuable thing I was able to take away from the conference was the knowledge I gained by taking a class under Susan King, an editor with The Upper Room.

While all the faculty at the conference went out of their way to show Christian love and kindness, it was Susan that I related to the most, and from whom I was able to learn the most. In addition to working as an editor Susan also teaches English at Lipscomb University. I stress the word teaches because not only was she able to cram a six week course in writing into four days, she was able to do so in a manner that was fun, enjoyable, and highly effective.

One of the things that made Susan’s class so good was that she assigned homework. One of the assignments, an exercise in simplified writing, was to write a 125 word paragraph using only single syllable words. If you think you know how to write, try the exercise for yourself. You can read my paragraph by clicking here. To say the least it was challenging.

I want to also give special recognition to Byron Hill, Executive Director of Lifeway Conference Centers and Camps, his staff and all the volunteers at Ridgecrest. The BRMCWC is held each year at Ridgecrest, NC, a conference center owned and operated by the Southern Baptist Convention. Byron and his people are responsible for seeing that Ridgecrest are second to none in every way, a goal at which they exceed in manner worthy of emulation.

From the moment I stepped into the Ridgecrest campus I felt as if I was home. The rooms were clean and comfortable, the dining hall spotless, and the food excellent. In addition to having all the comforts of home – minus the noise of screaming kids –the conference facilities themselves were spacious, and easily accessible. I can not say enough good about Ridgecrest. Whether you are Baptist or not, I suggest calling Ridgecrest for your next church conference.

Finally, if you are a writer looking to get published, let me encourage you to attend a writers conference. Within sixty days of attending my first conference I used the knowledge I gained and the contacts I made to become a published author. If the Lord is leading you to do something, nothing can stop is from happening if you will only step out on faith. When you do, you will find hundreds of other writers standing with you.

Good News and Bad News

I want to share with you a couple of things that have been going on these past few weeks.

First, Focus on the Family’s Clubhouse Magazine has agreed to publish one of my articles. It is the story of my daughter Maria as told from the view of her fraternal twin sister, Nicole. The girls were 29 week preemies and while Nicole was born fairly healthy, Maria was born with a small encephalocele. A shunt was put into Maria’s brain to drain away fluid, and for about three years she lived a fairly normal life, despite the fact that she could not walk or speak, and could only eat with her fingers.

Then about three months before before her fourth birthday, Maria went into the hospital to have her shunt revised. Sadly, when the doctor closed her head back up he did not check to see if the drain tube wasn’t kinked, which it was. More than 30 CCs of fluid back up onto Maria’s already fragile brain causing irreparable damage.

Today the girls are twelve. Maria lives in a special home for children and Nicole lives at home with her mother and me. Nicole and I sat down over the course of a few days and discussed her side of the story which she bravely shared in no small amount of detail. If you would like to read the in full story, it will appear in the January 2010 edition of Clubhouse Magazine.

Second, this next week (May 17-21) I will be attending the Blue Ridge Mountains Christian Writers Conference where I will be pitching my book, WAKING UP FROM A SELF-INDUCED COMA: A conversation about life, depression, and addiction. I have spent several weeks defining the scope of this book and developing its theme, and believe I am ready to pitch it to an agent or an editor. I have heard from many published authors that the first book is always written for yourself and is always therapeutic. If that is truly the case, I can only imagine how much money we will be able to save on family counseling. It could be into the thousands of dollars!

Finally, let me ask you to please bear with me. I welcome your comments, but I am dealing with some serious computer problems, and do not have the time or money to take care of it right now. My computer has lost some memory files that are necessary when going online and logging into any web site that requires a user name and password. Right now I am using my wife’s laptop. What this means to you is that comments will take some time to approve. Please bear with me, especially during the week of the conference as it may be a day or two before I am able to approve your comment. Just keep in mind that this web site is a dialogue, and I want to hear from you. Until then, God bless you.

Our Faithful God

I want to share with you the explosion of events that has occurred in my life in just the last five weeks that has suddenly launched me into a writing career. If this is not of God, I do not know what is.

Today is Sunday, March 22, 2009. Since February 13, 2009 the following things have happened:

1. February 13 – A lady I met on Twitter introduced me to an online writer’s group.

2. February 17 – Upon being accepted for membership in the writers group, I ask for help with my writing for the first time. My plea for help is heard and by a very amazing, talented, and successful author, Mr. Murphey, who happens to also be a man of devoted to helping others. In addition to this man, others hear my plea and lend me their support.

3. February 20, 21, 22 – Mr. Murphey sends me a personal email asking if I could attend a writer’s conference. Upon receiving my reply the next day, he asks me to call him at his home. When I call him he offers to pay all my expenses to the 2009 Florida Christian Writer’s Conference.

4. February 25- March 1 – I attend the 2009 Florida Christian Writer’s Conference where I am baptized by fire into the world of professional writing. I also meet several editors who express an interest in my work.

5. March 2 – March 20 Inspired by the Holy Spirit I write and submit to for publication 2 skits, one poem, and one article in addition to writing a second article that I will submit for publication in the near future.

6. March 15, 16 – After several days of prayerful contemplation the Lord gives me the inspiration to write a book, but not the words to begin brainstorming the concept. After a night of prayer I wake up a 4:00 AM filled with the words that have become the start to my first non-fiction book. Since then I have written a ten chapter outline, synopsis for 5 chapters, and actually written close to three chapters.

7. February 17 – Present From the beginning of this venture I have been encouraged to start a critique group. I toyed with the idea, but became frustrated with not knowing how to do it. Then when the weekly discussion in the writer’s group turned to critique groups, I again reached out for help. Since then two people have expressed an interest in forming a group online while one person even gave me a book on how to started different writer’s groups.

8. March 17 – I was asked by one of the teachers where I work to ghost write a portion of his life story to include his personal testimony and his relationship with his dad.

10. March 22 – Perhaps most important throughout all this has been the full support of my wife. If you knew how many ideas I have brought to her over the past few years, and how many times she has said, “No, just wait on God,” you would know how huge her support really is.

There is something else I need to share with you, something very personal. I will not air my dirty laundry, but will tell you that all these thing I have mentioned have come about after repenting of two very huge sins that have dominated my life over the course of the last ten or fifteen years, and perhaps even longer.

Despite constant pressure from God, I resisted for more than two year the call of God to repent of one of these sins, and in so doing nearly lost my marriage, and my family. It did force me to give up my ministry as a college pastor, although no one in the church knew about the sin, and my resignation was completely voluntary. Even then I held on my sinful lifestyle and refused let God cleanse me and recreate me.

What may seem strange to some is that I held on to this sin in spite of knowing for months, if not years, that God wanted to completely restore my life, if only I would just it down and walk away. I knew the floodgates would open for me to minister to people if I would just forsake my idolatry and let God have His way with my life. How He would do this I did not know, but I knew He would, and yet, I continued to resist.

When I finally did repent, an act that required a complete heart makeover, it led me to the discovery of the second sin, deep-seated pride. My heart, already broken after repenting of the first sin, was ready to hear from God when he revealed how I had made myself the center of a world where only He deserved to be glorified. I have already written on this so I will not repeat myself except to say that when I became aware of the fact that I was stealing God’s glory, I was deeply grieved within my spirit.

Now I have come full circle. Gone are the vices, the sinful idolatrous lifestyles of lust and greed that once separated me from my God who has stood beside me throughout this entire ordeal. I praise God, who despite being treated so poorly, never withheld His love from me.

I don’t pretend to know where you are in your walk with God, or where you have been, but let me encourage you to have a little faith in Him. Take God at face value when He tells you and I in Romans 8:35-39 this nothing we do can separate us from His love. Even though you and I may not be faithful to Him, He remains faithful to us, and is waiting to restore that which we are so often willing to throw away.

Faith, Research, and Reality

I feel led of God to write a non-fiction book on the subject of pornography within the church, a subject only a handful of pastors and counselors have written about. In just the few shorts weeks I have been working on this project, God has opened my eyes to many truths.

When I initially began this project, it was my belief that only one or two books had been written on the subject of pornography and the church and the need to address male sexual purity. Feeling there was room in the Christian market for another well written book on this subject, I began to explore some of the resources available to men and women who wanted help to overcome their life of sexual idolatry. I enrolled in an online class on sexual purity designed to help both men and women understand sexual purity from a Biblical perspective, but three weeks into the class it became clear that it was designed for people who had almost no knowledge of the Bible.

Frustrated, I dropped the course and shared my feelings with a trusted friend who understood my need to go deeper into the Word of God than just surface level. His response surprised me. Rather than offer his full support to move on, he challenged me on two points: 1) Examine my heart and make sure pride and arrogance was not what was keeping me from seeing the value of the course for what it was; and 2) Consider the possibility that the book I was to write would be for a more knowledgeable Christian audience.

Clearly the call to write for a mature Christian audience –wait a minute, did I just say that? Yes, I did. And when I shared the idea with my wife, she caught the lunacy immediately. In case you missed it, let me rephrase my statement: Clearly God has called me to write a book on sexual purity for mature Christian men who use pornography and possess a good working knowledge of the Bible. The statement is a contradiction in terms if ever there was one, and makes no sense.

And yet, there it was, a God shaped idea waiting to be fashioned. As I think about this odd challenge I have to ask myself and God, Is it possible that there are mature Christians in our world, walking talking, teaching and preaching among us who use sexually explicit, graphic material in addition to their Bibles on a daily basis? If so, am I the first person to recognize this niche in the Christian market?

Like I said, my initial research revealed very few books written on this subject, but as I began to pray specifically about the need to write for a more mature Christian audience, I discovered I was not the only whom the Lord has led to into this arena. In fact, a dozen or so books have been written about sexual immorality and pornography in the last twenty years or so, many in the last ten. This discovery led me to make some interesting and hopeful observations:

1. While it is sad that there is such a large number of Christian men (which includes pastors) using pornography – as many as 50% – God is calling church leaders, both men and women both, to write about this subject and provide some of the necessary means to help the church overcome this spiritual epidemic.

2. In light of this continued call to Christian leadership, and despite sexual immorality being such a pervasive sin, God still wants to redeem His church. Forgiveness from sexual idolatry still abounds through the Blood of Jesus Christ.

3. Hope abounds for the person seeking freedom from a lifestyle of sexual idolatry. Anyone who seeks God with ALL their heart, soul, and mind can be set free from this bondage.

4. God still uses sinners to advance His kingdom. Many of the authors who have written books on the subject of sexual immorality and sexual purity are themselves former slaves to the sin, or have used the testimony of other former slaves to teach the truth of God’s Word.

While these truths might be a slap in the face to the self-righteous, they are sweet music to the repentant soul. As for me, these truths serve as a sign of God’s love, as I take my place among the chosen few who have found freedom from the slavery of sexual idolatry, and have lived to share the hope that lives within me. May God truly be glorified through all I write.

Building Character Over Industry

Having lived for many years with limited means, financial hardship is something I wish on no person. As a concerned citizen of the Kingdom of God I have for years felt a need to help those who either can not help themselves, or need help to help themselves. I believe in giving sacrificially, which is a character trait I have tried to pass along to my children. I also believe in personal responsibility, and believe that if a man does not work, he should no be paid, which is why I am not an advocate of a Federal bailout for the United States automotive industry.

A few years ago, when employed as an over-the-road truck driver, I delivered parts to a General Motors plant. The delivery was my first at a GM facility and I was unfamiliar with union shop procedures. For this reason I became confused when one dock worker finished unloading a truck, and then parked his forklift and took a nap.

In my part of the US, the South, people with jobs work for a living. When a dockworker finishes unloading a truck, he will either start on another load, or help his co-worker unload his truck. No one sleeps on the job.

As it turned out, the reason why the dockworker at the GM plant did not start unloading my truck is because I was not on his dock. Until a truck was parked on his dock, he was under no obligation to do anything except sleep, while at the same time earning his full salary plus benefits.

I have no sympathy for the plight of GM or Chrysler, or any member of the United Auto Workers who possesses an entitlement mentality. I can not begin to imagine how many thousands, if not not hundreds of thousands of dollars are added to the price of cars each year because employees at a GM or Chrysler plant are paid not to work.

Not long after my delivery to GM I retired from trucking and took a job selling used cars at a local GM franchise. Because the dealership represented General Motors the majority of the used cars on the lot were GM products. I did not take this into account when I took the job, and in the four and a half months I was with the company, my family and I nearly starved.

While many of our customers were GM loyalists, the vast majority came to the dealership looking for Japanese imports. Cars manufactured by Ford, GM, and Chrysler that cost thousands of dollars less, and supposedly comparable Japanese models, were always passed up in favor of a more reliable and more durable product.

It saddens me to think of how many people could lose their jobs should the US automotive industry collapse. It saddens me even more to think that the United States automotive industry has been allowed to thrive for so long with an entitlement mentality while producing inferior vehicles. Much will have to be done by the Church to help those in need should the US auto industry collapse. Until it does, my prayer will be that GM and the rest of the US automakers wake up to the reality that when you build your house according to self-righteous and self-serving principles, you sow death to all who stand under your roof.

When Jesus Wept

In times of suffering, whether it be the death of a family member, the loss of a job, or the breakup of a marriage, people often turn to God in as they attempt to understand their loss. They look to the Bible for hope, seeking examples of men and woman whose relationship with the Almighty gave them the power and ability to overcome pain and anguish. Men such as Job and King David quickly come to mind.

While many people find comfort in the Psalms, I have over the years found great comfort during times of loss in verses like Hebrews 4:15, “For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet was without sin.”

It comforts me to know tht Jesus feels my pain, and when I look for evidence of this fact I find none greater than the tears he shed over the loss of his best friend, Lazarus, recorded in John 11.

Having died four days earlier, Lazarus has already been entombed when Jesus arrives at his home. As Jesus walks to the grave with Martha, Lazarus’ sister, we are told that he begins to weep (verse 35). Those persons who observed the scene interpreted Jesus’ mourning as a declaration of the Savior’s love for a friend. However, while this may be true, I am convinced there is more to this picture than a man weeping over the loss of a friend.

Jesus lived as the perfect example of human faith. He listened with spiritual ears to the voice of his Father, heard His every word, and obeyed His every command. In faith Jesus daily looked into heaven through the thin invisible veil that separated humanity from the divine and saw the heart of his Father whose power and love transcends both time and space. Because of his faith, Jesus looked upon that which would be as if it was already done.

By faith Jesus knew that Lazarus would live again. Such knowledge would have been reason for joy, not weeping. The apostle Paul tells us in Romans 8:24 that no one hopes for what he has. Jesus knew, even as Lazarus lie in the grave a rotting corpse, that he had life. Therefore the tears Jesus shed would not have been from a sadness over the loss of his friend.

Likewise, it is reasonable to say that Jesus did not weep for those who lost the one they loved. His divine knowledge would have allowed him to know and understand the pain felt by Lazarus’ sister, Martha, as well as the other mourners. But since he knew Lazarus was about to be given another chance at life, this would not have been reason for sympathetic tears.

Thus we are left with the question, If hope supersedes pain, why did Jesus cry? What would have broken the heart of Jesus when his best friend who was dead was about to come back to life? The answer, I believe, lies in understanding Jesus’ view of death.

Two months ago I read a book by a man named Don Piper titled 90 Minutes in Heaven. Back in 1989 Don died instantly when his Ford Escort was hit by a tractor trailer. Ninety minutes later, Don came back to life. In the interim, he says, he was taken directly to the gates of heaven. Although he never entered heaven, Don says his experience was enough to give him a glimpse into the glorious reality of what it means to absent from the body and present with the Lord.

The Bible tells us there is no place more glorious than heaven, where the Lord God rules and reigns from on high. Don describes the music of heaven as “a holy melody with a cadence that never seemed to stop… hundreds of songs were being sung at the same time, all worshiping God.” The streets, he says, were “contructed of literal gold” and the colors were “the brightest colors my eyes had ever beheld –so powerful that no earthly human could in this brilliance.”

From what I have read of Don’s story it now makes sense to me why Jesus wept just before raising Lazarus from the dead.

I imagine as Jesus walked to Bethany to raise his friend from the dead he thought of little else than the glory he once shared with his Father in heaven, the same glory his friend Lazarus was at that moment no doubt enjoying. I can help but believe that as he took those last few step toward the grave, it broke our Savior’s heart, knowing that Lazarus was going to have to leave that holy place, and knowing that he would one day suffer yet another painful death.

I also believe that in the finite context of human frailty the world has a very warped view of loss to include death. But what other view is there when Christians take seriously neither the glory of their eternal salvation, nor the serverity of eternal damnation? Truly the words of the apostle Paul are worth hearing, “I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us (Romans 8:18).”

Yes, the pain of our suffering is real, but hope looks beyond the pain to the reality of God’s glory. By faith, Jesus saw this glory, and now in the midst of our suffering invites you and I to bask in it as he share with us his comfort during our times of trouble.

Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us. – Romans 5:3-5

Thoughts on Columbine – Ten years later

Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold

Ten years has passed since Dylan Klebold and Eric Harris launched an all-out assault on Columbine High School in Littleton, Colorado that claimed 13 lives. I remember coming home from work that day, and like so many people, wondering what happened? However, unlike many of those same people, I did not have to ask why.

Having grown up angry and resentful of my own family, as well as the world around me, I knew all too well the type of pain felt by Dylan and Eric, and the irrational thinking that comes with it. For me, this behavior was the result of childhood abandonment by working parents who often over-discipline me to the point abuse. I had no where to turn for help, and for a number of years fantasized about killing my family as a means of escape.

Likewise, I hated school to include many of my fellow classmates – two in particular. I look at pictures of Dylan and Eric and relate to them in so many ways. Twenty five years ago when I was in high school I was thin, and fairly attractive. But at the same time I looked like a geek. I was bullied almost daily, took routes to classes to avoid certain classmates, and kept a journal in which I recorded all my hatred.

Today, looking back over the last ten years, it is easy to see all that went wrong, and why Dylan Klebold and Eric Harris did what they felt they had to do by hurting so many people and ultimately taking their own lives. Emotional and psychological pain can blind a person from reason and sanity. It is the soul crying out for God. Unless someone considered trustworthy can be found to help, the potential for harm can become as real as the wound in the one who is hurting.

As someone who has understands pain to the point of wanting to hurt others, I offer the following suggestions to avoid another tragedy like the one at Columbine High School:

Live a humble life. This applies parents and school officials. It is nothing short of pride and arrogance to make a mistake and not apologize for it. When a child at any age becomes hurt, the only way to heal that wound is to show genuine love and concern. However, there is no love and concern when an adult lords authority over a child and acts like nothing is wrong.

Give the child a voice. Children have rights, including the right to be heard. If Jesus was willing to lay down his life for children, the least an adult can do is stay quiet and listen. And not just listen with the ears, but listen with the eyes, and the heart. Stop what you are doing and pay attention to what the child is saying. Listen and do not try to fix. Do not have the next words you want to say waiting on your tongue. Actively listen and in so doing, actively love your child.

Lower your expectations. Help you child place boundaries on her life, and help set goals to shoot for. At the same time give her room to fail. And when she does fail, do not remind her of her failure but instead listen to her when she tells you why she failed. Only after she has used her voice do mothers and fathers need to step in with their wisdom from the ages. If a child is raised to fear God and keep His commandments, chances are good that God has already in some way spoken to them and that the child needs little input from a parent or a teacher except for love, encouragement, and prayer.

Pray for your child and pray with your child. It is foolish to expect a child to know how to go to God in times of struggle if parents are not willing to lead by example. Parents who blindly tell their children to pray and read the Bible without first teaching them how to do so hold their children to unrealistic expectations.

Take you child to church. It is ridiculous to think that just because a child goes to church he will not grow up to become a mass murderer. However, it is far more ridiculous to expect positive results from a child who has never attended church a day in his life. I grieve every time I see a parent in tears who wonders what went wrong that caused their child to commit a violent crime. I ask them if they ever prayed with their child, read the Bible to their child, or took them to church, and grieve even more when the answer is No.

Following this advice is no guarantee your child will grow up to be perfect. But even if your child has already starting showing signs of acting out as a result of his emotional pain, taking these steps will go a long way in helping heal his wounds. Know the Bible, and follow it’s teachings. Only when children experience the unconditional love of God will they truly feel accepted and not feel it necessary to defend themselves from the world.

Hope: An eternal perspective

The aparrent suicide by David Kellermann, acting chief financial officer of mortgage giant Freddie Mac, has once again helped usher the enormous pressures of our nation’s harsh economy to the forefront of mainstream reality.

I will not pretend to begin to understand what it must feel like to be the CFO of an iconic institution like Freddie Mac, and be the center of an investigation by the Federal government that in the long term may have dire legal consequences. Add to this what CBSNews refers to an ongoing battle “with federal regulators over whether to disclose potential losses on mortgage securities tied to the Obama administration’s housing plan.” Despite the pressure, suicide was not the answer to Kellerman’s problems.

I have long believed that by committing suicide the person who does so makes the statement that he or she is a better judge of life than God. In that person’s mind God has somehow made a mistake by letting them live, when instead they should be dead. For me it took twenty three years of wrestling with suicidal tendencies to come to the realization that it was not my place to play God and take my own life. Recognizing my suicidal thoughts for the sin they were, I repented of them by embracing God according to who He claimed Himself to be in the Bible. When I did, the reality of God’s love for me became greater than my fear of living.

Regardless the pressure you may be feeling during these hard economic times, the circumstances that surround your life will no doubt soon change. If David Kellermann had just hung on for a little while longer, he would have seen this truth for himself.

The Bible tells us in 2 Corinthians 4:16-18 not to base our lives on the things we can see, but on the things we can not see. That which can be seen is temporary; that which is unseen is eternal. Can you see a small paycheck? It won’t be small forever. Do you see an overbearing boss? They can change. Food, clothing, shelter, money, is all visible, and are based on circumstances that are temporary. As my father so often said to me, “These things too shall pass.” And they will!

But the things of God that we can not see do not pass; they are eternal. God’s love for you is everlasting, and nothing can take it away. The forgiveness of sins is eternal, therefore our salvation in Jesus Christ is eternal. As children of God the invisible fruit of His Spirit – love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control – is achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs anything we can see.

Let me encourage you to not give up hope during these tough economic times. Hope that is based on what you and I can see is false hope, and will surely leave us cold, and empty, and alone. But hope in the invisible things God gives us is hope in the eternal, and it is there that we will the find the strength to keep on living.

The Debate Goes On

Over the last few days several new comments have been posted under my December 2008 article, Are Mormons Better Christians?. Although I was surprised by the restart of the debate, I was not surprised to find world famous Christian antagonist Andrew Price in the midst of it.

Reminiscent of the first rounds of talks, I find my commitment to Christ being questioned by my fellow Protestants, and supported by those who are members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, despite openly stating that I am not Mormon, will never be Mormon, and in many ways completely disagree with Mormon doctrine. The only place where I have shown agreement with the LDS church is in the area of general principles concerning matters of marriage, family, call to mission, giving, and sanctification, all discussed in the aforementioned post.

I must reiterate that what sets me apart from other Protestant church leaders, and probably what gets me most in trouble with my fellow Protestants, is my willingness to concede the existence of double standards over matters of inspiration and revelation. I am willing to concede this point and yet at the same time remain staunch in my belief that the Holy Bible, and not The Book of Mormon or any other LDS writings, are the only inspired revelation of Jesus Christ.

As strange as it may sound, I can by God’s grace look at The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints objectively, and yet remain firm in my faith without passing judgment or feeling threatened. In so doing I am able to acknowledge the beliefs of those who do not share in my own spiritual convictions, while at the same time still be able to appreciate the value contained within their spiritual philosophies.

To the weak Christian whose identity centers around being affirmed by his fellow man and not the approval of God, this willingness to love without judgment may appear as tolerance of sin, and perhaps even spiritual indifference toward heretical positions on the Christian faith. However, nothing could be less true.

If I did not own my faith, which has been given to me by the Lord Himself, and I merely vacillated from one doctrinal position to the next, then perhaps there might be a point to all the harassment and ridicule. But my words speak for themselves; I am a conservative Christian and my willingness to love people who differ from me bears this out.

I do not say these things to pat myself on the back, or draw attention to myself. To God alone be all glory, not Tim Wade. All I am trying to do is prove that if you want to share the love of Jesus, you don’t do it by usurping the authority of the Lord and beating up your fellow man. Is it any wonder that with such hatred running rampant through every mainstream denominational church so many people have simply given up on God?

Why I Use Twitter

It seems like everyone that wants to be someone in social media is using Twitter. However, I struggle mightily to understand the value of this social media phenomenon.

I have been a active member of Twitter for nearly a year, and have around two hundred and fifty followers. I currently follow around two hundred people. Clearly the ratio is lopsided.

Nearly twenty-five percent of my followers are people I do not “follow back”. Most of these people are what I call social media predators who in my opinion see me as a means to their industrious end. Their bios include words like entrepreneur, coach, marketing expert, and consultant. Because I am still defining and shaping my social media platform, I suppose I come across as an easy target to these people.

I will be the first to admit that I do not have well defined boundaries on my social media network and do not subscribe to any well-defined genre other than Christian. This is not to say that I have never had a platform.

When I started using Twitter I had a very defined platform. At the time, I was serving as a college minister at a small Baptist church and had just started a Sunday evening contemporary worship service. My hope was to one day plant a contemporary styled nondenominational church, so I intentionally followed other church planters.

Initially, I enjoyed following this small group of men and a women who seemingly gave up everything to fulfill God’s calling upon their lives. But soon I became disgruntled with them. It seemed all they wanted to do was tell everybody how great they were as pastors or music ministers, or how great their church was. Several of them were even writing books.

It quickly became apparent they were not following me for what I could offer in the way of Christian fellowship,. Realizing that the group I was following were in fact following each other, and trying outdo one another in Jesus name, I dropped them.

If Twitter has any redeeming value to me personally, it has come in the form of a handful of meaningful friendships with people like Rick, Jimmie, Heather, Mike, Don, Kathryn, Natasha, Zach, Lynn, and Robin. I apologize if I left anyone out. If these people lived closer to me, I am confident that we would go to each other’s houses at least once or twice a year and share a meal or sit around and talk and drink coffee while our kids played together.

Twitter does serve a purpose in today’s society, and through the people I follow much has been learned, but for the most part it has proven to be a game of egos. My goal in life is to build relationships with real people in real life, and not see how many people will follow me just for the sake of numbers. If you want to follow me, please do, but not because you think you’re going to sell me something. Follow me because I speak the love of God and the truth about His word. Follow me on Twitter, because I follow Jesus.